Maialino (old)
2 Lexington Ave., New York, NY
Even some of the greatest bands in the history of music release bad albums sometimes. It happens. The Stones somehow thought Voodoo Lounge was a good idea. Oasis’ Standing on the Shoulder of Giants is one of the more unlistenable records ever. I’m sure some people were into it, but U2′s disco phase of Pop was a mess with the exception of “Staring at the Sun” – that’s a damn good tune. Kingdom Come? Jay-Z actually put his name on that? Jigga…what? If anyone other than Radiohead released Amnesiac, no one would give a rat’s ass, and that admission comes from one of their biggest fans.
These same failures happen in the restaurant game all the time (see Daniel Boulud and DBGB). For all intents and purposes, the title of this review should be The Spaghetti Incident – the god-awful piece of turd Guns N’ Roses album that was somehow allowed to go public following Use Your Illusions 1 & 2. Danny Meyer my friend, Maialino is your very own Roman trattoria Spaghetti Incident. You’ve done just about everything right throughout your career, and, even with this misstep, we’ll always have your back. Eleven Madison Park, Blue Smoke, Union Square Cafe, Gramercy Tavern and Shake Shack serve some of the best food this city has to offer. Naturally, since you’re the only restaurateur who owns two 9.0 ratings on our site, we put your work on a pedestal. We expect nothing but the best. Unfortunately, Maialino is a bust. Let us explain.
While the food isn’t terrible, it just didn’t strike us as inspiring, and the service was a train wreck. On three different occasions, drinks were ordered and simply not picked up from the bar until we reminded the waiter. After the bread (without bread plates), no one cleared the crumbs off the table…amateur hour. After each course, they took away your silverware but didn’t re-set the table until the next course was already down. Tough to eat food you’re supposed to share without plates or utensils. It was one thing after the next, and while it seemed like there were a ton of people working, there was zero cohesion. The cherry on the sundae was a nice long hair in the Brussels sprouts. Yum. Hey, at least we knew it came from someone’s head, right? To their credit, they did keep apologizing for the mishaps and comped dessert. Lastly, this whole traditional Roman trattoria thing is a joke. I mean, we’re in the Gramercy Park Hotel, and it just feels a little contrived. Glued on, uneven wood beams play no part in holding up the structure of the hotel, and the dark maroon paneling that lines the walls is ugly and looks like cheap plastic. And what, no Gladiators? Maybe Russell Crowe is getting wasted next door at Rose Bar.
Let’s make one thing clear. Maialino is not an awful restaurant, but it’s not of the caliber we’ve come to expect from Danny Meyer. If this were anyone else, it might be a different story. Fair or unfair, that’s just the way it is. Just like Mick and Keith experienced, it’s tough to write “Satisfaction” every time out.
Food Rundown:
Cacciatorini/Soppressata Piccante
These two salami options off the Salumi portion of the menu were fine, but nothing to get excited about. The small slices of Cacciartorini were dry and almost a little too sweet and I could have used a little more spice to the Soppressata.
Stracciatella alla Romana
If you sit down and think about it, the whole concept here is kind of gross. Broth of a chicken with what may essentially be its unborn fetus (hate that word) mixed up inside. The flavor did nothing to make this more appetizing. Damn, wish I had thought about all this before we ordered it.
Raviolo al Uovo
Had they demonstrated a little restraint with the salting of this dish, it could have been amazing. Ravioli of egg yolk, ricotta and potato was a really nice combination, too bad you needed three cups of water to wash it down.
Spaghetti alla Carbonara
I was really amped for this dish, a combination of black pepper, guanciale (an Italian bacon made with pork jowl) and egg as I’d read a couple raves on it. It was definitely tasty, something I’d absolutely order again, but it wasn’t the liquid crack I’d heard detailed in other reviews.
Coda alla Vaccinara
This entree of oxtails in a tasty stew of carrots and celery would have been a lot better had the fat been properly skimmed off the meat. Half this dish was inedible. It was a shame too, because the flavors were there.
Abbacchio alla Cacciatora
Once again, the cut of meat in this dish of braised lamb with onions and frascati (a Romanian wine) was suspect. The parts of lamb that were nice and tender were great; sadly, those pieces comprised about 25% of the action.
Bistecca di Bue
Pretty standard steak, this piece of sirloin was nowhere near up to snuff with what I’d expect at a Danny Meyer establishment.
*Since our party consisted of a couple non-pork eaters, we unfortunately didn’t try the big ticket here, the Maialino Forno for two. Rumor has it this “little pig” is ridiculous and the main reason to come. I’ll be back for you Wilbur.
try instead
Maialino
Gramercy,
NY
