Five Napkin Burger

630 9th Avenue, Hell's Kitchen, NY

4.8

map & more

Neighborhood
Hell's Kitchen

Cuisine
Burgers

Nearby
B.B. King
Nokia Theater

(212) 757-2277

Official Website

By Andrew Steinthal
January 15, 2010

If I lived in Hell’s Kitchen, (I wouldn’t, but if I did) Five Napkin Burger would probably be in heavy rotation. Only out of convenience though – it’s the best burger between 8th Ave and the Hudson River, and that ain’t saying much. Or, I might just trade in my dirty napkins for a pair of dope Nike’s, and take a walk east to Burger Joint, HB Burger or Five Guys instead.

Someone needs to explain to me why a burger joint would be compelled to serve a full menu of sushi. Where I come from, these two fine delicacies don’t play nice in the kitchen. You’re either in the mood for one or the other, and you certainly don’t want the greasy dude running the grill cutting up maki rolls and handling raw fish. I could see those kinds of shenanigans in LA, but not here. We’re better than that. After tasting a bunch of non-burger items on the 5NB menu, sushi is just about the last thing I’d want to mess with here; everything except the burger was straight up bad.

Food Rundown:

Deep Fried Pickles & Pastrami
We dig both of these things individually, but 5NB’s combination just doesn’t work. Pastrami is not meant to be eaten stuffed inside fried pickles; it comes out soggy and gross.

Hot Spinach & Artichoke Dip
Not terrible, just not something I’d necessarily order again. The dip itself is ok, but we’re not sold on serving endive spears to dunk. Just give us more bread please.

Hell’s Kitchen Wings
Sloppy, wet and nasty. That’s how I would describe these. They’re served in a green tomato and pineapple ketchup glaze which is borderline inedible. Skip it.

Original Five Napkin Burger
It’s one thing when a burger is sloppy, we’re down with that. It’s another thing your burger is dripping like Patrick Ewing in the 4th quarter. They weren’t kidding when they named this place Five Napkin. This burger goes beyond juicy, it’s a full on oil spill. You’re going to need a shower after this.

5 Napkin Veggie Burger
Not entirely convinced that there are no animal products in this veggie burger because it looks like raw meat. Also, just because you order a veggie burger doesn’t mean you want it on whole grain bread instead of the grease ball bread everyone else’s burger comes on. Make sure you ask for the toasted white roll instead.