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The subway during summer. The current season of Top Chef. Lebron James. The new M.I.A. album. Wildwood Barbecue. What do all these things have in common? They all f*cking suck.
For those looking for a little bit of suburban mall dining in NYC, you’re in luck…just wander over to Union Square East. You can go ahead and add Wildwood to your Brother Jimmy’s and TGI Friday’s rotation. For those of us who take pride in our never ending culinary crusade through the world’s best food city, this is definitely one stop you should avoid. I can think of ten BBQ spots in NYC I’d hit before this, and a couple of bodegas that serve pulled pork sandwiches too. Don’t Waste Your Time and Money, unless of course your crew of frat bros are in town to watch the big game and you need to properly let the dawgs out without being judged. In that case, the size (huge), sounds (Nickelback) and food (painfully average) might actually be what you’re looking for.
Dirty Bird Sandwich
Great name. This brings me back to my college days. There was a girl we nicknamed the Dirty Bird. She was real tall, extremely naughty and had an uncanny resemblance to Big Bird. She would have destroyed a couple of these pulled chicken sandwiches with pepper jack, bacon and onion rings…mostly because she didn’t use much discretion when it came to what she put in her mouth. In our book, this is a safe play and OK sandwich, but come on, it’s hard to screw up a chicken sandwich.
Texas Smoked Brisket
The only thing Texas about this brisket is the size. People expecting mouth watering Salt Lick style meat need to check back into reality. This brisket is uninspired, overcooked and on par with what you might find at office catering.
Carolina Pulled Pork
Making bad pulled pork isn’t easy, but they succeed in offering up some of the driest shredded pig on the planet. Prepare to douse it in so-so barbecue sauce.
Full Cut BBQ Spare Ribs
Damn, these ribs were extremely disappointing. I had to work really hard to get what little bit of meat there was off the bone, and was left hungry and unsatisfied.
Aged Cheddar Mac & Cheese
Worst mac and cheese we’ve ever tasted. Hands down. It has zero flavor and makes Kraft look like a delicacy.
Tater tots are one of those things that can go either way, they’re either perfectly crispy and amazing or no good. These were the latter.